University Shocked to Learn Students not Independently Learning

Many tutors and lecturers at the University of St. Andrews have been horrified to learn that instead of spending all day in the library, their beloved students are using Independent Learning Week as an excuse for leaving the bubble and exploring more exciting places.

Students independently learning the value of tacky t-shirts

Students independently learning the value of tacky t-shirts

As a fourth year (with no friends and a lot of dissertation to write), I spoke to fellow students about their Independent Learning Week experiences.

Initially I stood outside the library to catch up with the other sad saps that stayed in St. Andrews and studied. After waiting over fifteen minutes for anyone to appear, I spoke to Karen who told me that she didn’t have any work to do and only came to the library to check out the hot German post-grads.

I then spoke to my acquaintances who braved Leuchars train station and travelled home. On their journey of discovery, they had independently learned about how much they still loved their mum’s home cooking, how much their dog missed them, and how little their friends from home have achieved in their lives.

Still needing more information, I contacted Facebook friends whose parents definitely earn more money than mine, and who used the free week to travel. One unnamed student independently learned how cheap beer is in Amsterdam, and conversely, how expensive the prostitutes are. Unfortunately, he didn’t learn anything about the dangers of getting blackout drunk in a city of complete strangers, and will be returning to St. Andrews with two new STDs and one less kidney.

Through research and soul-searching, I independently learned how much of my dissertation I still have to do, and that there are less than two months until the deadline. I also learned, through the support of my mother, that writing articles for a satirical student paper might not be the best use of my final year of university.

 

Article written by Emily Sherriff